{"id":15261,"date":"2023-01-06T13:12:05","date_gmt":"2023-01-06T13:12:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/?p=15261"},"modified":"2023-04-26T08:18:51","modified_gmt":"2023-04-26T08:18:51","slug":"the-quiet-coach","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/","title":{"rendered":"The Quiet Coach"},"content":{"rendered":"

This is the very first edition of the TQC newsletter (congratulations or commiserations on being here from the very beginning). TQC stands for The Quiet Coach i.e., all of us who are interested in reflection and learning and growth as coaches. Hat tip to my colleagues
\nMeghna and Vandana for the name. <\/p>\n

I\u2019m making this very public commitment to all of you (shivers) that we will publish one post a week on matters of interest for beginner and practicing coaches. The intent is to keep our collective learning as coaches alive; in a form that\u2019s short and easy to consume at your own pace. <\/p>\n

I hope to also provide some nudges for you to experiment with new concepts and approaches. Please feel free to write to me at sunitha@navgati.in<\/a> with questions you\u2019d like addressed here (or if you\u2019d like to contribute to the writing). So, fingers crossed, here goes!<\/p>\n

Let\u2019s start at the very beginning \u2013 which is a very good place to start (if you don\u2019t get that very dated reference, please pause reading this and first go watch the movie, The Sound of Music).<\/p>\n

How do you explain what you do as a coach?<\/h3>\n

I\u2019m talking about the very first time you have to explain what coaching is \u2013 whether it\u2019s at a party and someone says, \u201cso what do you do?\u201d or whether it\u2019s to a stakeholder who wants an intervention for leaders in their organization or whether it\u2019s the prospective client themselves. <\/p>\n

The objective is that you present yourself in a way that is authentic, makes it clear what you have to offer the world and promotes an accurate picture of coaching. This is not a post about how to impress prospective clients; I see that as a natural outcome of clarity and credibility in your introduction.<\/p>\n

Most of you, if you\u2019ve done any amount of coaching so far, probably have a rough script for what you say when explaining what coaching is. Maybe just pause here for a moment, grab a sheet of paper and write down the key points you normally say before you continue reading (I warned you, there would be nudges).<\/p>\n

In true coaching fashion, here are a set of questions for you to reflect on as you review your introduction. <\/p>\n

What is the emphasis in your introduction on a problem centered explanation versus a growth centered one?<\/h3>\n

That\u2019s the difference between saying \u201cAs a coach, my job is to help people solve their problems\u201d vs \u201cmy job is to help people be the very best they can be\u201d. There isn\u2019t anything intrinsically wrong with the first one, but it could seem uninviting to people who don\u2019t see themselves as having problems or who feel it\u2019s not ok to get support to solve problems. I\u2019ve found it\u2019s more inclusive and more appealing to describe coaching as a process that helps people access their full potential. <\/p>\n

What is the balance in your introduction between the outcomes of coaching and what the effort is?<\/h3>\n

So typical marketing advice would be to focus more on what the client will gain from coaching (i.e. the outcomes). For example, you\u2019d probably prefer a doctor who talks about the pain relief you will experience rather than the details of the surgery.<\/p>\n

However, coaching is a relatively new field (and coaches don\u2019t always command the reverence that doctors do). <\/p>\n

Introductions that focus very heavily on the outcomes (you will feel a greater sense of control; you will make decisions with more self-awareness) \u2013 could leave people with the sense that this is somewhat of a magical process. <\/p>\n

Hence do make sure you explain the process as well (eg I will ask you questions that you may not have asked yourself; I will not judge you or your ideas in any way whatsoever; I will listen without trying to tell you what you should do)<\/i><\/p>\n

How simple is your explanation?<\/h3>\n

\u201cThe essence of coaching is raising awareness and responsibility to unlock potential and maximize performance\u201d. Perfectly accurate but it isn\u2019t exactly the way people speak. Using language that the client understands is especially important given the kind of equation we\u2019re trying to establish with them. <\/p>\n

Think of the last conversation you had with a financial planner\u2013 many of them use language that lay people don\u2019t understand either because they don\u2019t have the time\/mindset to simplify or because they want to create the sense of expertise (that they speak a language you don\u2019t; understand concepts that you don\u2019t). <\/p>\n

In coaching we\u2019re working very hard to create a psychologically equal relationship so avoid using jargon or complexity that takes away from that.<\/p>\n

Metaphors work really well to explain what coaching is. As part of our ICF accredited program, I ask beginner coaches to come up with their own metaphor for the coaching process and I\u2019m always amazed at how compelling and interesting those are. <\/p>\n

How inviting are you making coaching sound?<\/h3>\n

I find a lot of coaches going to great pains to establish what coaching is not. Justifiably so because coaching is a relatively new field and every coach has experienced the pain of a client being disappointed that you are not providing answers. <\/p>\n

However when all the coach says is \u201cI will not give you solutions; I will not share my perspective; I will not evaluate your ideas\u201d and nothing more, then the client is quite justified in wondering what a coach does do. <\/p>\n

Pay attention to whether your explanation reflects the value of the service you provide. <\/p>\n

What are you saying about your style of coaching? <\/h3>\n

It helps prospective clients to understand your personal philosophy as a coach, in simple language. For example, a strengths-based coach might say \u201cI believe that when people operate from their strengths, they experience satisfaction and success\u201d A highly empathetic coach might say\u201cI believe when people feel safe, they can face hard facts about themselves and my job is to create that safety\u201d.<\/p>\n

For example, my coaching is very informed by my training as a therapist so I would say something like \u201cI believe that all of us made a set of decisions in early childhood to help us cope and survive; not all those decisions are still relevant to us today. My role would be to help you evaluate which of those you would like to hold on to and which you would like to let go of\u201d. <\/p>\n

People need to not just understand what coaching is; they also need to get who you are as a coach. I agree that what you are saying may sound generic in your first few hours of coaching, but you will start to develop your own unique view of coaching \u2013 make sure your introduction reflects that. <\/p>\n

How comfortable are you talking about your expertise as a coach?<\/h3>\n

I\u2019ve seen many extremely competent coaches really struggle with this. We tend to apply either\/or thinking \u2013 \u201ceither I can be self-effacing about my coaching work or I can be like that boor on LinkedIn who keeps boasting about the work he\/she has done\u201d. <\/p>\n

The objective is to find the \u201cand\u201d \u2013 can you find a way to talk about your competence as a coach in an authentic way, without boasting or embellishment? <\/p>\n

Stories really help here as they do everywhere else. Telling a client \u201cI have over 100 hours of coaching with clients in the retail sector\u201d is not as compelling as telling the story of a leader you worked with who was struggling to develop her next line of leadership (without betraying client confidentiality in any way). <\/p>\n

This is not boasting \u2013 it is helping your prospective client get a sense of the kind of coach you are so that they can decide if you are right for them or not. <\/p>\n

How much do you involve the other person in your explanation?<\/h3>\n

This would be asking questions about their current understanding of coaching and their need; listening carefully and empathizing. It role models what you will be doing as a coach and also helps you understand if there are any dynamics you should be watchful of (e.g. a stakeholder wanting to use coaching to give feedback that he\/she is not prepared to give directly). <\/p>\n

Lastly, how much does your introduction reflect your own style?<\/h3>\n

Coaching is a partnership between coach and client. The coach helps the client to achieve their personal best and to produce the results they want in their personal and professional lives. Coaching ensures the client can give their best, learn and develop in the way they wish.<\/p>\n

This is accurate but doesn\u2019t in any way reflect the personality of the coach. If you have a sense of humor, use it. If you are naturally empathetic, make sure that reflects. If you\u2019re passionate about people making the most of themselves, let that shine through. <\/p>\n

I remember many years ago, my partner and I waiting to make our introduction as coaches to a group of coaching clients and their stakeholders. There was another senior coach from another organization who stood up before us and said \u201c50% of you in this room are going to be redundant in the next five years if you don\u2019t do something; my job is to help you stay relevant\u201d. <\/p>\n

Totally not our style. Being ourselves definitely meant that some leaders chose to work with that other coach and not with us; however, we were happy because it\u2019s better to find issues with alignment earlier on in the process. <\/p>\n

Here\u2019s what you can do to strengthen your explanation of what coaching is <\/h3>\n

Take some time to reflect on what coaching means to you \u2013 which clients have you enjoyed working with, where did you feel a sense of satisfaction that you gave your best; what
\nwhat did you bring to the table in those situations?<\/p>\n

Make your pitch; say it out aloud. Ask people close to you, especially any particularly honest friends, what impact it has on them. Keep practising and honing it as you go.<\/p>\n

If you have any questions or comments on this, please write to sunitha@navgati.in<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This is the very first edition of the TQC newsletter (congratulations or commiserations on being here from the very beginning). TQC stands for The Quiet Coach i.e., all of us who are interested in reflection and learning and growth as coaches. Hat tip to my colleagues Meghna and Vandana for the name. I\u2019m making this […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":17449,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[28,9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15261","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-all","category-coaching"],"yoast_head":"\nCoaching skills | ICF coach training | Navgati<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"A weekly blog focusing on coaching skills and various aspects of ICF coach training along with tips and techniques to keep our collective learning as coaches ongoing.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Coaching skills | ICF coach training | Navgati\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"A weekly blog focusing on coaching skills and various aspects of ICF coach training along with tips and techniques to keep our collective learning as coaches ongoing.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Navgati\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2023-01-06T13:12:05+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2023-04-26T08:18:51+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/TQC-blog-banner.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1300\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"1000\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Admin\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Admin\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"8 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/\",\"name\":\"Coaching skills | ICF coach training | Navgati\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/TQC-blog-banner.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2023-01-06T13:12:05+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2023-04-26T08:18:51+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/#\/schema\/person\/f0aa7c5415167bce4d28a6a144fcc4f4\"},\"description\":\"A weekly blog focusing on coaching skills and various aspects of ICF coach training along with tips and techniques to keep our collective learning as coaches ongoing.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/TQC-blog-banner.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/TQC-blog-banner.jpg\",\"width\":1300,\"height\":1000},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"The Quiet Coach\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/\",\"name\":\"Navgati\",\"description\":\"Welcome\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/#\/schema\/person\/f0aa7c5415167bce4d28a6a144fcc4f4\",\"name\":\"Admin\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/09c5d9adeb5a26851806beb3609534278bdc12b064e942fd48485ef1013e8ef0?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/09c5d9adeb5a26851806beb3609534278bdc12b064e942fd48485ef1013e8ef0?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Admin\"},\"url\":\"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/author\/admin\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Coaching skills | ICF coach training | Navgati","description":"A weekly blog focusing on coaching skills and various aspects of ICF coach training along with tips and techniques to keep our collective learning as coaches ongoing.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Coaching skills | ICF coach training | Navgati","og_description":"A weekly blog focusing on coaching skills and various aspects of ICF coach training along with tips and techniques to keep our collective learning as coaches ongoing.","og_url":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/","og_site_name":"Navgati","article_published_time":"2023-01-06T13:12:05+00:00","article_modified_time":"2023-04-26T08:18:51+00:00","og_image":[{"width":1300,"height":1000,"url":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/TQC-blog-banner.jpg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"Admin","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Admin","Est. reading time":"8 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/","url":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/","name":"Coaching skills | ICF coach training | Navgati","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/TQC-blog-banner.jpg","datePublished":"2023-01-06T13:12:05+00:00","dateModified":"2023-04-26T08:18:51+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/#\/schema\/person\/f0aa7c5415167bce4d28a6a144fcc4f4"},"description":"A weekly blog focusing on coaching skills and various aspects of ICF coach training along with tips and techniques to keep our collective learning as coaches ongoing.","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/TQC-blog-banner.jpg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/TQC-blog-banner.jpg","width":1300,"height":1000},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/the-quiet-coach\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"The Quiet Coach"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/#website","url":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/","name":"Navgati","description":"Welcome","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/#\/schema\/person\/f0aa7c5415167bce4d28a6a144fcc4f4","name":"Admin","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/09c5d9adeb5a26851806beb3609534278bdc12b064e942fd48485ef1013e8ef0?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/09c5d9adeb5a26851806beb3609534278bdc12b064e942fd48485ef1013e8ef0?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"Admin"},"url":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/author\/admin\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15261","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15261"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15261\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15281,"href":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15261\/revisions\/15281"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/17449"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15261"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15261"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15261"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}