\u201cI notice you smiled as you said that\u201d. Ever heard a coach say something like that when you\u2019ve been at the receiving end of a coaching conversation?<\/p>\n
Paying attention to the body language is a key part of being a coach. The ICF competency of \u201cActive Listening\u201d<\/a> calls this out clearly in the definition itself \u201cFocuses on what the client is and is not saying to fully understand what is being communicated\u2026.\u201d (the important part helpfully underlined and bolded for you).<\/p>\n One of the behaviours under this competency is even clearer \u201cNotices, acknowledges and explores the client\u2019s emotions, energy shifts, non-verbal cues or other behaviors\u201d.<\/p>\n Why is this important? Because for each of us, there\u2019s a lot of processing happening beneath our conscious level of awareness. These thoughts\/beliefs\/feelings could float up to the surface and get manifested in how we\u2019re using our bodies. I remember my therapist pointing out how my throat gets dry and I start drinking water every time I\u2019m talking about something painful. Clear manifestation of my difficulty with being vulnerable. So let\u2019s break it down \u2013 there are two skills involved. One, honing your ability to notice energy shifts and non-verbal cues. And two, the ability to bring it to the awareness of the client. This isn\u2019t by any means a comprehensive list so please do write back with other interesting behaviours you\u2019ve observed and we\u2019ll add it to this list.<\/p>\n So a good practise to develop this first skills is that for the next few conversations, immediately post the conversation, make notes of any such observations you\u2019ve had of the client. Then ask yourself if these could be indicative of any unconscious process going on for the client (for example, if you notice a lot of sighing every time you talk about moving into action, what could that mean?) As an aside, here\u2019s another good reason why it\u2019s important everyone who\u2019s training to be a coach has at least one long-term client (defined as five sessions or more) \u2013 it becomes much easier to test these hypotheses you\u2019re forming.<\/p>\n The second skill is being able to bring this shift\/incongruency to the client\u2019s attention and inquire into it. The process is reasonably simple \u2013 describe what you\u2019re noticing in simple, tentative and non-judgemental language and ask the client how they feel about it.<\/p>\n Some examples<\/p>\n You can practise putting down how you would share these observations with the client and either get some feedback on it or reflect on how the client might react. Think about how you could strengthen the articulation to minimise any chance that the client could feel judged.<\/p>\n One example I\u2019ve seen of a coach doing this really well is from the practise lab in our PCC training<\/a> a few years ago. The conversation went really well; the client had an insight about a relationship with a stakeholder and outlined what action she would like to take with that insight.<\/p>\n All hunky dory and the rest of the class was starting to stretch and look wistfully at the coffee machine when the coach said \u201cI\u2019m wondering about something \u2013 to me it seemed like your energy levels dipped when you were talking about the action plan. Is there something more we should talk about?\u201d<\/p>\n To which the client reflected and responded that she was unwilling to commit to the plan because she was still upset with the stakeholder. So the action changed to her committing to pay closer attention to her anger and bring that into processing in the next session.<\/p>\n If the coach hadn\u2019t done that, the client may not have got in touch with the remnants of her anger and the relationship may not have healed the way it subsequently did.<\/p>\n Any examples of your own where you paid attention to non-verbal cues or shifts in body language \u2013 do share what worked and what didn\u2019t. <\/p>\n For more information about Navgati ICF accredited coach training programs, please click here \u2013 http:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/icf-accredited-coach-training\/<\/a>. Paying attention to a client\u2019s body language \u201cI notice you smiled as you said that\u201d. Ever heard a coach say something like that when you\u2019ve been at the receiving end of a coaching conversation? Paying attention to the body language is a key part of being a coach. The ICF competency of \u201cActive Listening\u201d calls […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":17443,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[28,9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15932","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-all","category-coaching"],"yoast_head":"\n
\nWhen we notice and inquire into a client\u2019s non-verbal language, it achieves two things \u2013 we\u2019re letting the client know that we\u2019re paying attention to their entire being, without judgement. It also gives them an opportunity to explore what they have difficulty articulating or perhaps what they are not even aware of.
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\nYet this is a skill that you build in a slow, careful manner as you progress because if not handled well, it has the capacity to confuse or alienate the client. Several things could go wrong<\/p>\n\n
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\nNo matter what your level of coaching expertise, you can certainly practise the first skill. In your next coaching conversation, make notes of any of these behaviours on the client\u2019s part<\/p>\n\n
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\nCheck out http:\/\/projects.rapidmind.in\/navgati\/executive-coaching\/<\/a>for more information about the leadership coaching we offer.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"